Archive for the ‘culture’ Category

Since college people are already sleep deprived, it makes perfect sense to them to continue that trend. As mentioned in post #43, college people have their schedules packed to the brim, and a lot of energy is wasted in the process. So in order to fill that wasted energy, college people turn to the ultimate “quick-fix” energy booster known: Energy Drinks.

They come in cylindrical shapes and have strange names like Red Bull, Monster, or Rockstar. Some college people get intimidated by just the name itself. Which in turn causes them to consume them, because as we know, college people like to experiment. But that’s besides the point. The point is, is that college people consume these drinks like mad.

College people love the extra buzz they get from them. Compare it to a young child putting ice down their shirt in order to stay up until midnight to watch the fireworks on New Years Eve, well in the case of a college student, the ice is the energy drink. Whenever a college student feels slightly tired or “out of it” another energy drink is gulped. The process repeats itself until they’re so filled up with caffeine that they no longer can concentrate or are so hyper that they practically pass out.

If you’re walking around and see a college student flapping like a dieing fish or shaking uncontrollably then you know they’ve probably have had a little “energy drink overload” episode. This is not a good thing. Seek help immediately.

In the end, there’s something about college people and energy drinks that fit well together. It’s the fact that college people love having a fun, crazy-filled time, all the time, and energy drinks just happen to make the experience a lot crazier, flashier, and greater. It’s the latest trend these days. Maybe it’s just a passing fad—a hyper fad that is.


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If there’s one thing college people can’t get enough of, it’s definitely celebrity gossip. Many college people are so obsessed with it that they can’t function properly without getting their daily dose of it. A lot of them have their favorite gossip blog such as perezhilton or TMZ that they visit on a daily basis. A few of the overly obsessive OCD type college people typically visit the sites hundreds or even thousands of times a day.

In addition, college people also like telling the latest celebrity gossip with all their friends. But it’s not just a normal conversation like “Hey, did you hear that so and so is pregnant.” No, no instead it’s way more extreme like “OMG, have you heard that so and so is fricken preggers, and like what’s gonna happen next, and who’s the father… and like OMG I totally can’t believe this shit!” Then all their friends start talking about it and pretty soon it turns into a full fledged college cat fight with words traveling a bazillion miles an hour. It’s insane.

So the next time a big celebrity news event hits the press, be prepared for millions of college people literally going crazy over the news. And don’t be surprised if all their craziness actually turns into the news itself!! It seriously can get that bad. No wonder why college riots exist!

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College people love to smooch and make out hardcore in the dorm bathrooms. Such activity would typically be frowned upon by sensible older adults, but college people don’t think that way at all. Instead, it’s the best joyride of their entire lives, and some even manage to make it all the way to home base.

The deviousness of the activity is what makes bathrooms a popular hook-up spot for college people. What right-minded “experienced” old adult would think that bathrooms are the perfect romantic place for a date? Probably zip! And that’s exactly why “unexperienced” young college people choose bathrooms for their love sessions. You see, college people are natural redneck rebels, so it makes perfect sense for them.

In addition, what’s worse, is that college people like to tell all their little friends about the ordeal. They go up to their buddies and say, “Hey bitches, I made out in the bathroom with <insert name> and it was a great experience, it was so fergalicious.” And then their little friends blush in disgust, but then one bursts out saying “Wow, that sounds so fucking awesome!!” Then some high-fives are exchanged and then they go on with their daily lives.

Hooking up in the dorm bathrooms gives college people that extra little edge to make it through a long, boring day of classes. Whenever they get depressed or sad they simply think about it, or fantasize about the next one, and then everything all of a sudden becomes great again. It’s like magic. It’s also their secret life antidote. Shhhh…

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Obama and Clinton are pressing for the youth vote…

source: chicoER.com

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College people like to mate because it’s a deep urge that needs to be satisfied. They can’t help it, but their animal instinct prevails hardcore.

Some college people like it dirty, some like it clean, and some even like it doggy style. Whatever the frickin style is, it doesn’t matter. What matters is, is that college people love to mate.

Some do it in the bed, some do it in the bathroom, some do it on a bench, some do it in a car, and some overly confident ones even do it during lecture. Wherever it is, mating is still mating and college people always have a craving for it. It’s a deeper more compulsive craving than the rest of the “older” society.

In fact, college people would rather mate than study. It’s simply more appealing to them. Finding pleasure is a good thing for them and obviously mating is a pleasurable experience. Hmmm… it looks like they found the mother lode!

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College people are overly addicted to duct tape and use it to their advantage in many bizarre and quite frankly strange ways.

You see, college people are clumsy and therefore duct tape comes in handy whenever they break something and need to fix it.

When college people are out of toilet paper, duct tape is a blessing. The stickiness of it does the job surprisingly well.

Since college people are poor, many use duct tape to cover up holes in their pants or shorts. It’s becoming the latest fashion trend in college these days.

Overly creative artsy exotic college people enjoy making 100% duct tape frisbees. Then they show it off to all their friends, and everyone’s like “Oooooo ahhhh” as if it’s like Edison inventing the light bulb all over again.

Mean college people like doing stupid pranks with duct tape like taping up their roommate or taping dorm doors shut. They get a bizarre kick out of it.

College people also like to take a single strip of duct tape and run it across their shirt and then put their name on it. This helps professors remember their name. If they don’t want their grade to be affected, they write their roommate’s name on it.

In the end, college people and duct tape go together like velcro—fast on, hard and noisy off, but the lovin’ is still there.

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#37 Sushi

College people have a secret crush on sushi. No joke. A lot of them grow very fond of it during their sophomore or junior year when they realize that their “pigging out” on junk food during their freshman year wasn’t exactly the greatest of ideas.

College people like sushi because it’s healthy and the price is not all that bad. Sushi is considered an art form, and college people find that eating something so elegantly designed is super hip. It satisfies their aggressive, hyper-activity needs to devour anything that looks like it could be devoured.

College people also find that eating sushi relieves stress and makes them horny. Agreed— sushi is the new college aphrodisiac.

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